Proposition #378

This winter weather has made commuting to work a real pain. I'm so tired of having to de-ice the Falconmobile every morning on my way to work. I guess I could build a garage for my car like most "normal" people. But that's not solving the problem. Most parking lots are still exposed to the elements, and with icy road conditions and motorists moving at snail-like paces, it's a real hassle to commute.

That's why I've devised an alternative to this mundane winter monotony. Behold Proposition #378: Giant Robot.

 Traffic? What traffic? It's a giant robo-suit to commute in. Now I'm not talking about all those Hollywood movies, with giant metal heroes that save the day and fight off the aliens. I'm talking about the awesome factor.

Can you even begin to imagine the amazing things you could do with a giant robot? Okay, first thing in the morning you wake up; you want breakfast. Forget breakfast! You can throw a car 500 yards with your robot arms!

I've comprised a list of some super cool things you could in a giant robot suit:

• Tackle a train, and win with my giant robot suit.
• Shoot lasers out of my giant robot suit.
• Liquidate an elephant in a single stomp in my giant robot suit.
• Sink Hawaii with my giant robot suit.
• Ride Godzilla with my giant robot suit.
• Jump the Grand Canyon in my giant robot suit.
• Co-star next to Shia Lebeouf in my giant robot suit.
• Defy laws of physics in my giant robot suit.
• Fight an alien invasion in my giant robot suit.
• Go to grocery store in my giant robot suit.
• Get eggs in my giant robot suit.
• Get milk in my giant robot suit.
• File taxes in my giant robot suit.
• Call mom in my giant robot suit.
• Feed komodo dragons in my giant robot suit.
 

 

In my giant robot suit. 

-The Falcon